Day 94

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Day 94

This is a video of Sandra Bullock reacting to criticism. Such a lovely woman. I let other’s criticism shape me for years but like Sandra, I’m learning to choose another view of the world, life and myself. It’s taken me a long time to realize that those who criticize others, have issues, problems and faults far greater than those they find in others. It’s taken me a long time to realize that their opinion of me does not have to be my opinion of me or my truth. It’s taken me a long time but I’ve taken back my power and I realize no one shapes my life, my future, myself but me and no ones opinion of me matters a smidge compared to my opinion of myself. I know me, I know my truth and now, is the time to live that truth.

Day 93

Not much time this morning. I only have about two hours in the sleep column for last night. I’m visiting a friend today and I’m already running late. I haven’t had breakfast yet but I did fit in ten minutes of aerobics and my weights. Today was measuring day and I was down an inch and a quarter in my waistband half an inch in my hips. Oddly, I was up a quarter inch in my thighs; maybe it’s the squats and aerobics? Whatever the reason, I’m okay with it...for now. 😊

So, I’m down a little over nine pounds on day 92. Considering that I haven’t really been trying to lose weight, I’m very pleased with those nine pounds. It may seem slow to some but as long as I’m moving in the right direction and establishing healthy habits, I’m okay with it. I started keeping my food diary again today. I started exercising first thing in the morning again yesterday. Now, I’m trying to set those habits in stone. Sure I’m just starting again which leaves me twenty days to go but look how far I’ve already come. 😊

Oh....and down two more pounds this morning!😁

Day 91

16 ounces of water.........👍check

15 minutes aerobics.......👍check

High protein breakfast...👍check

Day 90:

Weights/day 2 this week

Squats/5 sets of 10

15 min. Aerobic activity

Day 90

Technically, I’m three months in. 

Have I accomplished everything I’d hope to do by this point? Not even close. 

Am I still proud of everything I have done in 90 days? Absolutely!

No, I haven’t lost the unrealistic amount of weight that I, in the beginning, hoped to lose by this point but I’ve lost 7 pounds and multiple inches. And I’m eating healthier, thinking about what I’m eating and why I’m eating. Consequently, I’m eating less often and more aware of when I’m actually hungry and when I’m full. I still enjoy good food and I haven’t restricted myself from occasional indulgences but I’m enjoying my food more and I’m aware of all the sensations of eating something I enjoy and not just mindlessly shoving food in my mouth.

The weight is not falling off but the numbers on my scale are steadily declining. I know I’m not to the point where others can see the changes in my body but I see them. I feel lighter and usually more energetic. But I’m listening to my body and if it signals me I need to rest, I rest. 

I’ve always felt like I need to be on a strict, regimented schedule to make anything work including a diet. That appeared to work when I was younger but it also usually led to burnout. It may have taken weeks, months or even years but eventually, I reached the point when I said, I just can’t do this anymore. Since I started this journal ninety days ago, I’ve been striving to establish habits. I’ve become frustrated when unexpected events, obligations and illness seemed to throw off those efforts.  I kept saying to myself, start again from zero but now, I realize, I wasn’t starting over from scratch. I was simply continuing on my journey after a brief diversion. I’m learning finally to be flexible. I’m realizing that the absolute balance I’ve always desired isn’t necessarily the answer. Rather, I want to simulate the Willow tree. It gracefully bends in the wind but remains strong and rooted. I’ve noticed that you rarely if ever see an uprooted willow after a storm but you see plenty of those strong but inflexible oaks. From here on out, I aspire to be a willow. 

Day 89

We were planning to go hiking today but woke up to find Bodie with a severely swollen neck. Steve later admitted that something had either bitten or stung Bodie while I was feeding the horses and Steve was walking Bo. I knew something was wrong last night when Bodie refused a treat. Steve said he was too full but Bodie never gets full. This is how it looks now after several Benadryl. It’s gradually getting better and he’s eating fine now. 

Day 87

I’m feeling much better today. Even though I’ve been awake since 3AM, I’ve had a slow start to my day. I did fit in those 5lb weights for my arms. It proved to be much more difficult than I thought to do 3 sets of 10 with some of the lifts. The curls were easier so those muscles must be some I use a lot. I also did an over head lift which wasn’t hard until the last set and side lifts that were hard with only the second set. That tells me two things, I need a lot more work with those muscles and maybe getting started, I should drop down to 2.5lb weights. You are suppose to skip a day with weights so I’ll be doing this again on Sunday. And now I’m off to clean my kitchen before I leave to have lunch with friends. Hoping all of you have a great weekend!

Day 86

This has not been my week. 

Monday, I almost pass out while the vet is floating Mouse’s teeth and no, it wasn’t a reaction to the dental drill. 

Tuesday started great and then Danny stepped on me and ground my little toe into the dirt. Monday was spent being sick and Tuesday, with my foot wrapped with ice. 

Wednesday, I had on again-off again stomach problems which I blamed on a suspicious meatball I’d eaten the previous afternoon. I couldn’t remember when I made the meatball but my questions about it’s freshness were answered last night. I was sick all night long. Finally found some medicine to check it early this morning and have managed to grab a few hours sleep. Although, I have to say.....

Thursday’s prospects are not looking so hot. Forget my planned trip to visit my friend, Jane. She just had surgery so she doesn’t need me around just in case I’m wrong about this being food poisoning. Also, I don’t really feel up to driving anywhere so there goes errands I thought I might do after visiting her. In fact, I don’t really think this will be a very productive day since I’m still tired and my stomach feels like someone used it for a punching bag. Unless I improve drastically, I doubt I will complete my exercise goals for today. But that’s okay. This will pass and I still have what I hope will be an uneventful Friday to look forward to. 

And I’ve learned a valuable lesson, never eat anything when you have no idea how old it is. It may look fine but it could be masking its age like a movie star. 

Day85

Just had my weekly coaching call from Velma. I was happy to give her a good report even though I’ve had many interruptions, unexpected events and distractions this past week. I still haven’t established that exercise habit which means it was much to easy to let that slide but despite that, I lost a pound of weight and two inches off my waist, one inch from my hips and nearly two inches from my stomach. And I was more active even though not with intentional exercise. My goal for the next week is just to do 10-15 minutes of exercise for at least five days and do free weights for 3sets of ten with each exercise for three alternating days. That doesn’t sound like much but I’m really starting from zero again.