Despite an incident with the Bodie dog last night involving him taking off suddenly in pursuit of a critter in the hay field and trying to take me with him which twisted my back and had me limping back to the house while dragging a 70 pound dog, I'm feeling much better today. Like everything else, healing is a process and I'm sure there will be setbacks, great days and bad days along the way. I'm feeling super positive and energetic though and very blessed. My injured back is such a minor thing compared to the pain and illness so many people deal with chronically. A friend's grandson was born with a condition that affects his joints, tendons and muscles. He's already had so many surgeries in his young life and just had a very extensive surgery yesterday with another to follow soon. He is such a brave little boy and so bright and happy. He doesn't let any of it get him down. So, if he can deal with that, I can certainly deal with this tiny little setback in my life with positivity. My problem will resolve itself if I can just remember not to do anything to aggravate it. That's harder than you might think. We do so many tasks in our day without even thinking about them. And, I'm at an age where too many thing are on automatic repeat and my brain is not engaged. lol

I had my last call with my sweet Ms Velma yesterday. I've come to love that lady so much and I told her so and thanked her for all the encouragement and advice she's given me. I will miss her but she is so proud that I've been "graduated" from the health coach program that my insurance provides. She told me that I've made her look good and that the others in her workplace have started calling her the Weight Loss Guru thanks so my success. She said, "I tell them that you are the one who did all of the hard work and I'm so proud of you and how far you've come." I told her that I truly don't think I could have done it without her support. She's like Josh, neither wants to take the credit for how amazingly good they are at their jobs. Both say they are simply cheerleaders for our effort but it is far more than that with both of them and I realize how blessed I am to have found them both. It has been hard work but I didn't accomplish this transformation (still not there yet but moving in the right direction, lol) on my own....it has truly taken a village and I'm grateful to them all.

I have realized a few things over the past few weeks and some of those epiphanies are the reason Velma felt so good about letting me go and letting me stand on my own. One thing is, I haven't done this on my own; I've been blessed with a lot of support. The second thing is, in thinking it might all be snatched away because of the possible surgery and two months of down time, I finally realized just how far I've come in the last three and a half months that I've been working with Josh. I'm stronger, I'm more agile, I'm more energetic and my clothes fit much better. And besides being grateful to Josh, I also realized how much hard work I've put in and I'm proud of myself for the dedication to this commitment of getting healthier and fitter. I still only see the fat I've yet to lose when I look in the mirror but I realized a third thing, I am 63 years old. That's hard for to admit to myself. I have no trouble telling other people how old I am because most of the time they tell me I don't look it and that makes me feel good. lol But it is hard to wrap your head around those numbers. All of us may age on the outside but we still feel like the same people on the inside. Realizing that I am 63 is not a bad thing because I don't have such unrealistic expectations. That means that I hopefully won't push myself so hard because I expect to be capable of the same effort now as I could have done thirty or forty years ago. It also means that I won't judge the body I see in the mirror as harshly and I won't have unattainable expectations for it either. I'm most likely never going to have that flat stomach and six pack definition I once had but I will be the best I can be at what ever age I am. And in time, I will come to accept the wrinkles and looser skin....maybe not today but someday.