Discouraged

Maybe it’s because, with over forty pounds lost, I’m still only half way to my goal weight but I’m feeling discouraged lately. I got a bit of a lift yesterday when some smaller sized pants arrived and I put them on to discover they were falling off my hips. Then I looked at the tag and saw they’d just sent the wrong size. Despite my disappointment, I do realize that I would have been thrilled to have that size, which is still smaller than what I wore then, fit so loosely four months ago. My health coach, Velma, keeps telling me that I need to look at how much I’ve accomplished not how far I still need to go but it’s hard when I seem to have this schizophrenic perception of myself. Some days, I see I’ve lost and maybe even see myself slimmer than I am. While others, like yesterday, I only see the fat that clings to my body. True, I’ve lost the equivalent of a very large Christmas beef roast, especially in my stomach area, but I still see a 25 pound turkey hanging there. I will keep pushing forward but it would be much easier if I felt better about myself.